Today I felt motivated to pack up all the kids' winter clothes, and bring out all the summer clothes. I know that every year, never fail, as soon as I do this it snows again. At this point... I don't really care. The fact that I actually brought the bins upstairs and had the DESIRE is a miracle! I'm ready for brighter days!
I have to admit, I'm not sure why, but I have had absolutely no motivation to do my housework. I'm not talking a day or two off... I think that since January, I have not been able to get anything done!
I hate admitting this... but today was the first day I have washed and folded laundry in a long time. Meaning, every piece of clean laundry is folded and put away! Not in a pile somewhere.
My clean laundry comes out of the dryer and sits on the couch. I always tell myself I will fold it in a minute, as soon as I do "this" or "that". A week later... I still find myself moving it from the couch to the bed when company comes. Then moving it back out to the couch before I go to bed. Seriously! In the effort it takes to transfer it as many times as I do... I could fold it and put it away three times!
I've never been the best at keeping everything clean, I can think of maybe a few days a year when every room is clean (and it's not even EVERY room, just the ones we use daily), when I actually feel "on top" of all the chores. And every time I have one of those moments...they are few and far between... I tell myself "I will keep it like this every day!" I decide that maintaining the cleanliness will be easy. And a week later you would never guess it had ever been clean.
Now I'm not saying that it's "dirty" but messy! Cluttered, stacks of mail and papers, dishes in the sink (if I've moved them off the table already), crumbs on the floor, toys in places they shouldn't be, and the dreaded laundry on the couch!
Mr. Smith is so patient. He has never some home from work and said anything negative. He has never had 'expectations' . (I guess maybe if he did, he forgot them a long time ago!) It's just recently that I've noticed... that when Mr. Smith gets home, I have not done much housework. I don't have dinner ready either. Not that I would ever have things that 'put together', but at least if the house wasn't clean I could have dinner... or vise versa.
Mr. Smith has 'lightened my load' by doing the dishes. Some days... I look around and think that it's the only thing that's ever done. He'll come home and either help make dinner... or even make it himself if I have to go somewhere. WHAT"S MY PROBLEM???
I'm an all or nothing person. So when I clean... I CLEAN! Like today, I finally put away the laundry. So I decide to swap out all the seasonal clothing. I just don't know why I can't put a quarter of that effort into everyday. I can't figure it out. I've made myself cleaning schedules, given myself New Years resolutions, simplifyed and throw away things I don't need or use, and I've tried diet Dr. Pepper in the mornings... it's not working. (But the DP sure takes the edge off)
So I ask myself, if I can't get anything done... what am I spending my time on? I don't even know. Sometimes is kid stuff, phone calls, emails, things for my calling, volunteering, and other things I just like to do. The fact is... house work is just not something I like to do. In fact, I hate it. Therefore, I have a hard time pritoritizing. It's hard to put something I dread at the top of my list. I will do ANYTHING else that needs to be done before I do housework.
I spring cleaned half of my house and... stopped. Half. I guess half is better than none, but COME ON! We got our carpets cleaned... it was great... two days later Sassy Pants decided she doesn't want to be potty trained anymore! I looked at my newly cleaned carpet and thought "what's the point?" She has continued to have accidents on everything from my carpets, to my hardwood floors, to two different comforters. She even peed on her backpack. It 's like "Hmmm. What's the hardest thing to clean?...I think I'll pee on THAT!" She even had an accident at school. Honestly! So I guess that's what I spend my day doing... just the day-to-day crap. The stuff that's NOT on my list of things to do. The things I have to take care of at that moment... and the regular housework becomes the least of my concerns. Blah!
I'm hoping that today will be the 'kick in the pants' I've needed. Just to feel how good it feels to get so much done. It really feels good. Maybe if I do it again tomorrow while I still remember this feeling, I can keep it going. I can hope!
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